Paradise Lost in a Crowd

By Staff Writer, Molly Joylee

It’s a fact. The City of Seattle Department of Neighborhoods doesn’t recognize Maynard Park, and that has some residents feeling like they’re invisible. A conclave of concerned Maynardites met recently to explore this community identify crisis.

“It’s as if we don’t exist,” decried Gretchen Oublie, echoing the sentiments of those gathered for coffee at the Maynard Park Donut Yurt. “Every other Seattle neighborhood has something that makes them special, something real and tangible that people can rally around. Here in Maynard Park, we have nothing…”

With that spark of anguish, a grass-roots initiative was conceived and the “We Identify Maynard Park” (or W.I.M.P.) citizen activist plan was born. While still in its infancy, a contagion of actualization has begun to crawl, from neighbor-to-neighbor, in a search for a sense of shared self. Their goal is a simple one: Give Maynard Park a “centerpiece” to distinguish it from all other Seattle neighborhoods.

To embark on this mission, the W.I.M.P. citizen council has announced a series of sojourns to selected Seattle Neighborhoods to study and analyze what makes these other neighborhood places unique.

The Maynard Park Neighborhood Blog will be traveling along, as imbedded reporters, with the “We Identify Maynard Park” entourage, and we’ll be reporting on their findings in the weeks ahead.

The citizen council was unanimous that their vision quest would start at the feet of a bronze Bolshevik Russian communist revolutionary…so, you know, we’re heading to Fremont.

Crepes, Glorious Crepes!

Restaurant Review by Food Critic, Marnie Basket
Every neighborhood has its own unique signature restaurant that can almost define a place. The Sky City Restaurant at the top of the Space Needle is one example, for whatever actual neighborhood that is. Canlis is another example, for the off-Aurora neighborhood where it resides.

In Seattle’s Maynard Park neighborhood, the quintessential character restaurant has to be the Crepe-Ateria, brimming with every crepe the mind can comprehend.

The Crepe-Ateria doesn’t just randomly present and arrange crepes. Emulating the natural progression of a dining experience, starting with an appetizer, moving on to an entrée, side dishes and then desserts, Crepe-Ateria owners Justin and Justine have clustered their fair in a logical physical layout. Starters like Deviled-Egg Crepes, Pigs-in-a-Crepe and Swedish Meatball Stuffed Crepes are located right up front as your first grab down what locals affectionately call, “Crepe Alley.”

“We offer 45 varieties of crepes,” says Justin. “If it isn’t a beverage, it’s a crepe.”

Further down the lanes of platformed, steaming goodness, you’ll find Creamy Tomato Pasta (in a crepe), Parmesan Chicken (in a crepe), Perfect Pot Roast (in a crepe), and you’ll think you’ve seen double when you encounter the Crepe-in-a-Crepe, for the purists.

One bit of fun is the “Crepe Surprise” steam tray, with the absolutely no-peeking rule. A word of warning for anyone considering one of these crepe-wrapped animal, vegetable or mineral items…If you have ANY dietary restrictions or preferences of any kind, you should not venture into the Crepe Surprise tray.

My advice, don’t skip dessert! You’ll have to pace yourself, but hold out for the Chocolate Mousse Layer Cake with Toasted Marshmallows in a Crepe, the Decadent Gruyere Donuts and Goat Cheese in a Crepe, and the Crepe-Ateria’s piece de resistance, Flaming Apricot Brandy Crepes on a Skewer (however, parents are strongly cautioned to supervise their young ones when carrying their “Olympic Torches” back to their tables.)

Whether you’re genuinely hungry, or if you just like to see a spectacle, you should definitely make the Maynard Park Crepe-Ateria your destination the next time you’re zigging or zagging through the neighborhood. 

I almost forgot to mention, it’s all-you-can-eat ($17.95 for adults, $15.00 for seniors, and $6.95 for Kids.)

Maynard Park Art Show Review

By Art Critic, Sean Travelmore
If you haven’t been down to see the latest art installations at Maynard Park’s venerable art gallery, “El Galleria”, you owe it to your inner docent to pay a visit. The current show is dynamic, eclectic, surprising, inspiring and outraging, all in equal parts. I went to El Galleria for the show’s open, and I’ve chronicled the following report…

When approaching El Galleria, the first thing that you notice are the doors, through which you enter the grand foyer of the gallery. Once in the foyer, I was greeted by Jasmine, who took my coat and asked me to sign the register. I was then guided to descend the gently sloped, dimly-lit narrow ramp down to the main exhibit hall. On my way, I was enticed with the sweet aroma of an array of delectable fair prepared to sate the nosh needs of the patrons of the arts who had gathered away from the cold and chill of these waning days of winter.

First up was a tray of Spicy Wonton Triangles with Garlic Hummus to dip. I pondered its contrast long enough to detect a note of sage that spoke to a sense of emotional realism. Before I could look up, a sudden movement crossing from my left field of vision revealed a succulent platter of Tuna Nicoise Canapés. Oh, these were so good. I had two.

My sojourn down the ramp and into the hub and splash of the gallery fair tired my feet and I needed to momentarily sit to fully take in my surroundings, climbing the figurative banks of the river to bask in the swirl without being a part of it. From my perch, I was able to balance a glass of freshly poured Sauvignon Blanc in one hand, and juggle both a Mini Beef Wellington and a Sweet Potato Cake with Fresh Cranberry Relish in the other.

My friend, and local artist Stephanie Marklark, stopped by to chat with her own small-plate of Coconut Shrimp with Curried Hummus, and Pepper-Crusted Beef Crostini with Arugula. We did some snack trades, plate-to-plate, and then got lost in conversation about reupholstering projects over several more rounds of wine.

Before we knew it, the lights were being blinked to encourage our ushering back up the narrow ramp, to our coats, and back out into the sense refreshment of outdoor air, filled with images and tastes that would inspire us as we rejoined our lives.

Erin Go Brouhaha

By Editor-in-Chief, Tom Doppler
“Can’t we have a St. Patrick’s Day Celebration where something doesn’t upset the Council?” With those familiar words, another emergency meeting of the Maynard Park Neighborhood Municipal Urban Council convened early this morning to discuss the unauthorized “dumping” yesterday of gallons upon gallons of green food dye into the Maynard Park water tower.

Council President, Pamela Stockingbird, reprimanded the three Council members responsible for the St. Patrick’s Day action by quoting article 7, section 3.2.1, sub-section 4, which states clearly, “no civic-pride activities that impact neighborhood air quality, water quality, air-space, rock formations, or designated historic trees, shall be engaged without the full review and approval of the Maynard Park Neighborhood Municipal Urban Council, and proposed said actions may not violate any City, State or Federal Laws unless said activities are deemed as sanctioned civil disobedience.” 

No defense was offered for the unauthorized actions, and a general apology was accepted by the Council. As there were no citizen complaints, the matter was marked “closed” and was recorded as MP Council Infraction 03.17.12.23-6.

Neighborhood resident, Mike Sanders, was in attendance as a citizen witness and provided the following comment that was recorded in the formal meeting minutes. “When I saw the green water coming out of the tap, I was scared. I thought it might have been due to fracking, and then I remembered it was St. Patrick’s Day, and it made sense. I don’t think it was a good idea, but no harm done.”

And so it goes… Everyone at the Maynard Park Neighborhood Blog hopes you had a safe and happy St. Paddy’s Day. Enjoy your Sunday and the work week ahead!

Give Hot Yoga the Cold Shoulder

By Staff Writer, Lynda Zen
Who wants to sit, dripping and stretching in a literal sweatbox of humanity? No one. At least, no one who knows better. Clinical studies are showing that the ever-popular Hot Yoga trend isn’t all that hot when it comes to your health and well-being. It’s unnatural to intentionally exert yourself into contortions while sitting in the equivalent of a California Pizza Kitchen brick oven.

There’s a better way.

A new Yoga Studio is about to open in the Maynard Park neighborhood, and they are blazing new trails of fitness, but without the heat. The Early Frost Yoga Studio will take an approach to Yoga that is literally the polar opposite of hot yoga. They will be introducing Cold Yoga, and the crowds are shivering with anticipation. In a business move that’s as much practical as it is synergistic and mythical, the Early Frost Yoga Studio will be opening in the space formerly occupied by a Cold Stone Creamery. The Ultimate Ice Cream experience gives way to the ultimate “Ice Scream” experience, with the ingenious incorporation and repurposing of the refrigerated cold stone slab. As Bevan McClure describes it, “the yoga room will be maintained at 30 degrees during all classes, and the cold stone slab will be used during our primal scream yoga ritual. Slightly, but tastefully denuded participants will be ceremoniously lifted and glided onto the slab during the Moon Salutation sequence and encouraged to scream if they feel so compelled.”

Bevan went on to acknowledge that novices to Cold Yoga may have some hesitation to jump in feet first into what some have described as serrated needles of pain. He assures that they will have an introductory beginner’s class that will allow participants to wear survival suits until they become more acclimated to the cold yoga environment. Says Bevan, “the health benefits outweigh the slight risk of hypothermia, and it’s really good for your pores.”